1. You meet a guy and he is OH, so SEXY, However, something just ain’t right? You can no pinpoint your suspicion but you know something is NOT the business.
3. You go out with a guy and you find yourself being asked if you would like a soft-drink, (not just a drink), but a soft-drink? In addition to that, you find yourself at a restaurant in the category of Denny’s, Bubba Gumps, Barnacles, or Chipotle?
4. The guy you met, shows up for your date in an entirely unattractive get-up. Think along the lines of the following: un-matching shirt and pants, a pair of Vibrams, and no damn flowers?! I have attached a picture of Vibrams so you know EXACTLY what I am talking about! EXACTLY!
5. A dude who appears, at first, to just be totally into you, however, you determine through “Text Messages” (Because, I guess his actual phone doesn’t work to place voice calls….) that dude is really a pervert. Like, dude will just UP AND SAY what he wants from you and what he wants to DO TO YOU? In other words, a, “To Catch A Predator” type of guy! No bueno. SMDH
6. A man that is very quite about his family & work life. I mean quite in the sense that when you ask him about something of importance, let’s say, a JOB or if he has any KIDS, he’s quick to divert the question back on you?
7. A guy that YOU HAVE NOT physically gone out with or established any type of relationship with, but one day you get a “Text” or IN THIS CASE, a “Phone Call” asking YOU FOR SOME MONEY?! OHHHHH HELL NAW!
8. A dude that is disfigured in some sort of way but really, really, cute! Cute enough to MAYBE go out with. Okay, when I say disfigured I mean slightly, like in missing a finger or toe, or MAYBE has veneers (but you didn’t know that one till after), or MAYBE a wondering EYE (but not all the time) or JUST MAYBE Wears a toupee (That can be fixed). You say to yourself, “Self, you know, I’m always complaining about not having a man, maybe I shouldn’t be so visually demanding. I’m going to give this a shot.” So you are cool with your decision to date said guy, but THEN YOU HEAR THIS FOOL MAKING FUN, YES I SAID F.U.N. OF SOMEONE ELSE OR CALLING SOMEONE UGLY just to be “Cool”. OHHHHH PUMP YA BREAKS CUZ I WAS JUST GETTING READY TO GIVE YOU A CHANCE. Now I know I ain’t lowering my standards!
9. A guy that just wants to be friends? Really? Just friends? Translation Ladies & Gents—–He wants some Goodies! Yall DID KNOW that right? I got my own friends and would hope at your age you got some too FOOL!
10. A FLY GUY, I MEAN FLY! A fly guy who always is sniffling or has glazed eyes? This same guy thinks that Drugs are COOL, and actually chastises YOU for not doing cocaine or ecstasy or meth or pill poppin. SMDH!
OKAY, SO THOSE WERE MY TOP TEN PET PEEVES! LEMME JUST SUMMARIZE THIS FOR YOU REAL QUICK! IF ANY OF THESE GUYS ARE SOMEONE YOU KNOW OR RECENTLY MET……RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! THIS AIN’T NOTHING BUT THE DEVIL TRYING TO MESS YOU UP. I HAVE MET EACH AND EVERYONE OF THESE GUYS AND SADLY HAD TO CUT THESE MEN LOOSE! SERIOUSLY LADIES AND GENTS, PLEASE DON’T SETTLE FOR LESS.
*****IF YOU LIKE A CERTAIN TYPE OF DINING EXPERIENCE, DON’T DO CHIPOTLE ON A FIRST DATE.****
~IF YOU CAN BUY YOUR OWN DRINK, PLEASE DON’T LET THIS DUDE INSULT YOU BY OFFERING YOU A SODA POP~
~IF YOU DON’T HAVE A SOLID FRIENDSHIP WITH SAID GUY, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF BABY JESUS, PLEASE DON’T PAY FOR ANY OF THIS MAN’S BILLS!~
~IF YOU HAVE A SENSE OF FASHION, PLEASE DO NOT STEP OUT THE HOUSE ON A DATE WITH A HOMELESS LOOKING MAN!~
~IF YOUR GUY INTEREST, IS ONLY INTERESTED IN GETTING YOUR COOKIES AND IS EXPLICIT IN DOING SO, CALL NBC’S CHRIS HANSEN AND SUBMIT THIS FOOL TO PREMIER ON “TO CATCH A PREDATOR”!~
~IF THE GUY IS HUSH HUSH ABOUT HIS FAMILY AND JOB. YOU HUSH-HUSH TOO, PERMANENTLY.~
~AND FINALLY, IF DRUGS ARE HIS FORTE, THEN BABY, GET READY TO BE UNDER POLICE WATCH, YOU KNOW CALIFORNIA HAS A 3-STRIKES-AND-YOU-ARE-OUT LAW RIGHT? DON’T RISK YOUR FREEDOM FOR SOME DAMN LOOKS!
OKAY, THAT IS ALL FOR NOW! HOPE YOU LIKED!
XOXOXO
ANJI RAY
VIBRAMS, EVERY DATE'S NIGHTMARE!
Anji Ray--Thoughts Of A Panamanian Actress 